I’ve been having trouble bringing myself to blog the past few days. Part of it is that I haven’t had anything as exciting as trip recaps or “Bible Cure” debates to write about. But part of it is that I’ve been frustrated.
I’ve been on a blood sugar roller coaster the past few weeks and it’s been exhausting. Exhausting physically from the spikes, but also mentally from the range of emotions the numbers make me feel. Highs leave me feeling guilty (why did I have to eat that?) and angry (WHY DID I HAVE TO EAT THAT?), while lows irritate me (why didn’t I see this coming?) and throw me into a panic as I fumble for sugar.
As if those emotions weren’t enough, I always have the fearful “what’s next?” in the back of my mind. As someone who appears to have type 1.5, I feel like I’m always waiting for the other shoe to drop. I’m only on medication right now, but when is that not going to be enough?
I hope this ride stops soon.